Thursday, May 15, 2008

ReLaTiOnShIp 101

1. A man won't let go if he really

loves you.

Do not hold on to someone who has let

go of you. He does not love you and

does not value having you. Believe me,

he will not let go if he really loves

you. There is another reason he is not

willing to tell.

2. Do not look for reasons why he

ended the relationship.

There is only one reason why he ended

your relationship. He just does not

love you. Do not waste your time

thinking of reasons or what you should

have done. Move on and be open to a

man who will truly love you.

3. Do not get hung up on your past.

Do not nag or distrust your current

boyfriend just because your ex hurt

you. Do not treat him or the

relationship the same way. Do not

compare. He will not react the same

way as your ex. Do not be worried that

your simple mistakes will cause him to

look for another girl. What happened

with your ex was not your fault. It

was not because you didn't guard him

enough or you didn't make him happy

enough.

4. Do not look into images.

How many times have you met a girl who

didn't have the best image in school

or at the office, but you get to know

the girl and found out she was

actually extremely nice? Do not rely

on images. Oftentimes, it is far from

reality. Do not fear men just because

your "supposedly" perfect ex-boyfriend

mistreated you.

5. Always have your own set of rules.

Set your limits on how far you'd go

for a guy. It's perfectly ok to give

and do everything as long as it's

worth it. And it's worth it if the guy

is treating you right.

6. Do not be scared to lose him.

Don't be scared that he'll break up

with you. Once you are afraid of

losing him, you easily can be taken

advantage. Be strong and if something

is unacceptable, do not accept it and

speak up.

7. Avoid calling your guy.

It's a guy thing. The relationship

will definitely be better if it's the

guy who's calling, not the girl. He

will get tired of you if you keep on

calling. He will lose interest and

challenge. More

so, he will get annoyed. But it's a

girl thing also that your fingers get

too itchy until you dial his number.

But avoid as much as possible. Call

only if really needed (like checking

if your suspicions are reasonable).

8. There is a guy who will value you.

There is a guy out there who can make

you feel valued, appreciated, and

loved. And I mean, not just during

your first few weeks together. So

don't lose hope. Don't settle for a

lesbian if you are not attracted to

women. There is a man out there who

can love you like a girl can.

Also, do not believe him when he says

it's just the way he really is. He's

not the sweet or expressive-type.

Remember during your first few weeks

together? Where has that sweet guy

gone? He simply is not that into you

anymore.

9. Always be the only one, no matter

what.

Do not ever fall for a guy who has

another girl, be it his wife,

girlfriend, or any girl that he says

he just can't get rid of for whatever

reason. If you truly believe that he

loves you and for some reason, he

can't leave or let go of another girl,

then you are no different from any

ordinary mistress.

10. He must respect you.

No matter how long the relationship

has been, he should always show

respect towards you.

11. If he fooled you, end it.

Philandering once is enough. You can

never trust nor respect the person

again.

12. Never start a relationship the

wrong way.

Do not steal another girl's man, for

whatever reason. Nor should you enter

a relationship for the wrong reasons

(loneliness, on the rebound, getting

back at your ex, man-dependency, etc.)

it is bound not to last. You will only

end up wasting more years of your life.

13. Do not force yourself into a

relationship.

Do not get into a relationship just

because your friends are getting

impatient with your dating escapades

and the one hasn't come yet.

Ever found yourself holding back because you're too proud?

I realized that pride would get me nowhere. You'll never get anywhere if you don't start somewhere. So swallow your pride. But what I failed to mention was that the absence of pride makes me feel so bare. Like I'm holding on to it for that just-in-case moment that I realize I just don't want to give it up--- just yet. Maybe until I realize and find the right reason for taking in my pride and as a result, would actually make me a better person. Maybe I'm still waiting for that "humbling experience" to happen. You know, the kind of experience that just makes you realize your flaws and that you have to change not for anyone but for yourself. Am I making any sense? Well my point is, I'm slowly but unsurely taking in my pride in hopes that by doing so, I'm becoming a more mature person, a braver being. I hope. But I think what I'm doing is a meaningful endeavor and maybe more because I think that person may be worth getting to know, may actually be worth my while. We'll see. So find a cause, something that you think is worth your while. And if it's a someone, you have master patience and ask yourself if he/she is worth knowing or talking to and that person would make you someone better. Cheesy, yes but hey that's the truth!:D I end this with a quote in my head:

" When you find someone who makes you smile, when you find someone who makes you learn to love, who makes you wake up to the reality of life, when you find someone who truly listens and shares what he thinks, when you find you want to spend every hour, every minute, every nanosecond with that person, keep him and if he's not yet yours, find him. Everything starts with that one step that makes all the difference in the world."



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3 comments:

Mo said...

What an insightful piece. You are wise beyond your years. #3 is one that usually nags on. Thanks.

DUI lawyer in LA said...

thanks, I'm happy you enjoyed your visit

Anonymous said...

i guess the same advise stands for the opposite sex