Monday, December 1, 2008

Can a Man and a Woman stay friends?

Can a Man and a Woman stay friends?

This is a compilation of reactions from my blog post a long time ago where a lot of debate goes on weather a man or a woman can just be in a stage they called “just friends”, will there be sexual attractions going on or will the platonic friendship with the opposite sex stick to just being friendship. Read more about my reader’s reaction through my email.

This is from a single girl around mid teens.

I think we can be. As a matter of fact, I find it's so much easier to talk to guys (I'm a girl) than girls. Maybe it's because I'm finally exiting the awkward teenage stage (I'm 18), or maybe it's my interests/hobbies. I don't know. Even if there is that attraction, if you both decide not to go there, then sharing secrets and taking long drives just build up that friendship. By the way, the points that the Rabbi gives only apply to married people. What about us singletons??

Another reaction came from a single woman who has a guy best friend.

My best friend is a guy. He is married and I am not, but we have been friends since we went to college. It has always been platonic. I am even friends with his wife now. Even though we live several hours apart, we make an effort to see each other as often as possible and we still talk on the phone at least once every two weeks or so. I decided a long time ago that if I dated a guy that had a problem with this friendship, then it would be the boyfriend that would go, not the guy friend. While I would not share things with my friend that I would not share to a future spouse, sometimes it is nice to get that male perspective on a problem.

Based on my experiences, there is no problem with a guy and a girl being nothing more than friends.

The last testimonial comes from someone who doesn’t agree on the issue.
No matter how much people will deny and claim that it's "just friendship," a man and a woman just cannot be friends. There will always be some type of sexual thoughts underlying the friendship. I know that nowadays it's common for friends to engage in sexual activities without actually dating. In that case, then yeah, I guess men and women can be "just friends" if that's what you consider friendship. But if we're talking about a normal friendship as would occur between the same sex-- then no.

Before I got married, I wouldn't waste my time with "friends" I had no intention of banging. My husband was the same way. Now that we're married, to avoid problems we just don't have any friends. We're happy this way because we are each other's best friend.

So there you have it, 3 different reactions from 3 different people. I guess we will never conclude if men and women can just stay friends.

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Links for Further interest:
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